Fireplace Fun
10 minutes...tops
REAL EXPERIENCE / FAMILY MEMORY / FUNNY
When our home was built we had a wood-burning fireplace installed. While the concept sounded appealing, we did not use it anywhere near as much as we thought. In the 26+ years, we have been in this home I think we may have lost power overnight only twice in all these years. On one of those occasions, our furnace experienced a hard failure and we were home on a very cold Minnesota night. That evening, the wood-burning fireplace paid for itself. We stoked the fireplace and we all slept in the family room which was the one room in the house that remained cozy. The repair person's emergency charge in the evening was $1000. In the morning the service was $150. The memory of that overnight in the family room is an endearing family memory. I think the only other time we lost power overnight was a “500-year storm” with rain that seemed to inspire building an Ark.
Occasionally, we might see the power go off for a few minutes but it is not a part of modern life here in flyover country. I have lived in six different states and interacted with the government agencies in each of them in some ways. Almost everything is just reliable and runs as expected in Minnesota. I have grown to take it for granted. When I hear stories of how poorly elections are run elsewhere, or lengthy power failures, or schools closed for days when it snows, I realize that the investments in infrastructure be they heavy regulation of investor-owned utilities, a seeming oversupply of snowplows, or simply running a thoroughly planned and executed election is something that we just take for granted here. When our children were in elementary school there was a remarkable snowstorm coupled with frigid temperatures. During that storm, I remember the news reporting it was the FIRST TIME IN HISTORY that the Minneapolis/St. Paul airport was closed. A few years ago the Governor decided to close schools in the state because of forecasted cold temperatures. Hearty Minnesotans were not pleased and didn’t want our kids going soft. Perhaps it is the Scandinavian influence or the extra planning that the weather extremes require. Whatever the reason, for frequent readers of my posts, this is why “we like it here!”
Several years ago my wife wanted to retrofit a gas-burning fireplace. As in most things, C was a visionary and it was a wonderful idea. It has become something that got more use in the first year thereafter than the wood-burning fireplace did over 15+ years. It has become a wonderful feature of the family room.
Part of the installation included a dedicated gas line with a shutoff valve. All of the “moving parts” of the fireplace are behind the grate below the hearth. The igniter has a battery backup if the power were to be out. Instead of finding dry wood, ensuring the flue is open, and stacking and getting the fire going (and making sure it is burning out before you go to bed), we now merely use the remote control to turn it on or off, turn on the fan and adjust the flame. It is better in every single way than the original fireplace. All modern equipment seems to incorporate more and more technology of course. The smell and sound of wood crackling are available in the firepit if we need a fix.
In order to make the fireplace look nice, all of the hardware is out of sight behind the decorative gate. Beneath the hearth is the gas shutoff valve, the igniter, the power supply, and the remote control sensing. The first time I had to reset the controls many years ago, I left a small flashlight there so it would be there when I need to read the directions which are also stored under the hearth. I try to plan for the unexpected. The instructions for setup and restart are also under the hearth so everything I might need if there was a problem with the fireplace was organized or so I thought. The only thing you need to operate the fireplace is the remote control shown below. We mostly just use the ON/OFF switch and sometimes reduce the flame so the room doesn’t get too hot since our thermostat for the home is in the same room.
This has been the summer that never ends with temperatures again forecast in the sixties for the first weekend in November and an expectation of 60F+ highs this weekend. There was no need for the fireplace on that evening as the room was very comfortable. Tonight was reserved for Game 6 of the World Series and that was the plan.
Without really thinking about it, I decided to press the remote control ON/OFF button for the fireplace. The igniter made a subtle click and gas flowed through the plenum and the fireplace sprang to life. This is wonderful and easy and hence as I said previously, a tribute to my wife C and her visionary capacity to understand why something of this sort would just be a much better mousetrap. I sat, briefly transfixed by the fire, watched the condensation of the cold glass fog up briefly until the temperature in the room equalized and both sides of the pane achieved equilibrium. There is something about the trance of looking into a fire. It is relaxing and its variation is entertainment for the eyes. While all of this was satisfying, I would soon regret turning on the fireplace.
For a while, I have been working on a self-improvement habit and I have been largely satisfied with the results. The purpose of the habit is to remember to think/contemplate why I am doing something whether it is saying something or doing something. At this point, I did not realize I was avoiding my advice. If I could make time go backward, I would ask myself the following three questions and unless the answer to all three were yes, I would not do what I was considering.
Does the fireplace need to be started?
Does the fireplace need to be started by me?
Does the fireplace need to be started now?
In hindsight, the answers to those questions are (1) not really (2) no (3) no. While the fireplace burned and brought me a bit of enjoyment, I went into the kitchen to make some tea and get ready to watch the game.
When I came back into the room, I asked my Smart Speaker to turn on the game. it was already noticeably warmer so I reached for the fireplace remote and pressed the ON/OFF button again. Nothing happened so I pressed it again, this time paying attention to the red LED that illuminates when the remote pairs with the receiver. Still no action. I went close to the fireplace where the remote receiver is and again there was no activity on the remote. It was likely the battery was dead. I opened the battery door, removed the battery and cleaned the terminals in the remote and on the battery with a pencil eraser (that usually works by the way), and reinstalled the battery. I pressed the ON/OFF again and there was no sound or flashing LED. Oh well, for want of a battery the fireplace was lost.
At this point, I regretted turning the fireplace on and wish I had thought about my three questions. Since the remote control needed an unusual battery, I looked to see if the spares were in the drawer where we keep the remote. They were not there. I went downstairs to my “organized” battery cabinet. in there I have battery rechargers, button batteries, and all sorts of alkaline batteries of every size. I checked in each of the labeled drawers but could not find the spares I needed. At this point, it is worthwhile to point out that the battery I need is not AAA or AA but a specialty 23A 12V battery. These are not sold at Walgreens and they are one of the reasons I have a dedicated place to keep extra batteries. I looked in a couple of other places the batteries might be but no luck. In the meantime, my alarm for the tea went off. It was time to at least have a cup of tea. The tea was nice but it did not clear my head sufficiently to locate the extra batteries.
By this point, the front grill of the fireplace was very hot to the touch and I did not have the means to turn it off or even lower the flame. This was started to become a hassle. Drastic measures, especially when not well thought out can lead to disasters, but I continued. I grabbed a few potholders, got in the family room, laid down a thick towel on the carpet, and one on the couch I would lean it against and removed the heavy screen. Fully fifteen minutes later it was still HOT to the touch. In the meantime, I reached under the hearth and shut off the natural gas supply line to the fireplace. Finally, I was making some progress but by now the game had begun. It was at that moment that I decided to tell this story in a post while it was still fresh in my mind with a warm cup of tea. I wasn't going to miss the possible last game of the World Series because of a battery. This was shaping up into an unexpectedly funny story, with a three-question lesson for me.
I went online to Amazon as I knew I had bought the replacement batteries from them. Sure enough, my purchase history revealed that I bought a 4-pack of the batteries. They must be SOMEWHERE. The last thing I wanted was to have to buy more of them since they only fit the fireplace remote and I think they seem to last 2-4 years. Now I could be overconfident that the solution was in sight. I finally looked in another place and sure enough, found the batteries. They were in a Ziploc bag with a couple of other unusual batteries. The others were for solar outdoor lights and I must have removed the bag when I was replacing those earlier this summer. The final step of the mystery was solved. The tea was finally tasting great at this point. I warmed up my cup of tea and wrote a bit more of the post.
Now, all that was left was to turn open the gas line again and reset the igniter controller which was straightforward. I tested the functions on the remote and disposed of the old battery in the recycle container. It was at this point that I decided to get out my battery tester and check the 3 AA batteries that are the battery backup for the igniter. After this evening adventure, it only seemed sensible since the grate was off to test them in case the power goes out at some point. I wouldn’t want to take off the hot grate in the dark as that would add just another level of uncertainty beyond potholders and towels. All was well with the batteries so I placed the grate back on and the adventure of the evening was complete. I took the Ziploc bag of oddball batteries and put them with all of the rest in the handy battery spot. All was well in the world again, the fireplace is ready-to-go for the season and the Braves are counting the outs to their first World Series title in over 20 years. Here’s a wonderful song from a great band of my youth. Their name goes well with the theme of fire. The song I chose is in deference to better preparation next time. I think this test should take place BEFORE the winter is upon us, hence the song. While I was adding photos to this post, my YouTube feed continued with this song I enjoy and played this one I have shared previously. It is so wonderful to me because it combines creativity, collaboration, and spontaneity. I think following this man on YouTube will be something almost everyone will not regret. What more can you ask for from street musicians. I hope you can join again tomorrow.
Since this was the first time I wrote about something that happened the SAME DAY I reached out to a friend J who kindly gave me some editing and content advice which I cheerfully accepted and incorporated. For those of you who are fans, you realize this sat around for a bit as the Braves won the WS on Tuesday night. I thank my friend for his advice and hope that all of you get a smile out of the story. I think we can all relate to when 5 minutes turns into 90 minutes.
13+
Earth, Wind & Fire 👍
(I always wondered what might have happen to “water.”)
Bravo.