Getting older is much better than the option. As we age, there are more things to prod, assess, and periodically check to make sure we are aging gracefully. We live in amazing times and medical science has refined its ability to diagnose so much that can go wrong in these complex machines AKA our bodies.
It is time for that periodic test that many of us just don’t know how to talk about in polite company. It seems to bring with it for some, outsized anxiety that is probably overstated or just unnecessary. Tomorrow I will arrive around seven AM in comfortable clothing for a colonoscopy. My oldest son is going to drive me there and it will likely be over before I know it. This is not my first rodeo, so there is no anxiety over what comes next. Frankly, at least for me, in all things medical, the more I know the better. I wear a “smart watch”, have a portable blood pressure meter, and have come to “love” if that is possible, my continuous glucose monitor (CGM) to help manage my Type-2 diabetes. While I have not taken the jump yet, there are now amazing, quite inexpensive smart scales that can make all types of conclusions about me. My watch even reminds me when I’ve been sitting for 50 minutes or more to remind me to move. I have found by using the feature, the greatest outcome is I am more aware and get up now before I ever get a reminder.
I think that I have fully embraced the Information Age we are currently riding. For me, the more I know the better. I still remember a wonderful class that I took as an undergrad called control theory. Now I suppose that if many people confronted such a class in the catalog they might not respond the way I did. This was just part of the curriculum for me and I spent a good portion of my career putting it to practical use. Our professor had a sign at the top corner of the board (probably a blackboard as I am of the age) that featured the quote “You cannot control what you do not measure.” At least in medicine, I think all of these tools that we have to more carefully keep tabs on ourselves give us opportunities to live longer and more active lives. I realize Jack LaLanne didn’t need a smartwatch. He knew, instinctively, that if he could swim long distance towing a boat, he was probably in great physical condition. While the video is choppy, he was certainly ahead of his time.
While I realize that my complaints will go unanswered, I do have a few issues with my test on Monday morning. I also realize that it is not wise to raise such complaints toward a person who wields the scope paraphernalia they will use on me. So I decided the best way to deal with perhaps a bit of anxiousness is to post it here as I doubt the technician has yet discovered this wonderful newsletter of mine. So here I go:
I wish there were better food recommendations for the prep period. I love and have grown accustomed to my plant-based diet and the deviations for me are legion if only for a few days.
The fact that I wear a CGM gives me instantaneous feedback on how bad the “low-fiber diet” recommended actually is for my condition. While I can live with deviations while on vacation, consciously eating stuff I really no longer enjoy all to prepare for a procedure where I need to lie prone for 30 minutes doesn’t seem fair.
I wish the container of “liquid” I must consume was not provided in what looks like a portable gas can. The product, if you look closely has a cheerful name. The pharmaceutical industry spends lots of time in their naming processes I am sure. I just think, in this case, the name of this product should actually be the admonition for my technician tomorrow rather than for me to drink a large volume of a funny-tasting liquid in a bit of a chugging contest.
Starting in the afternoon, the diet pivots to liquid only. I am already sure the day will speed by. I decided to add a little work to keep my mind off tomorrow in the late morning. I’ve already mixed the gas can and am chilling it for improved taste. All kidding aside, I am glad that the test has almost arrived. I will get up at about 230 AM tomorrow to empty the other half of the gas can as my final preparation. More information is almost always better. I look forward to the results and the return to my normal regimen. Since tomorrow will be all about relaxing, I thought this music introduced to me by my wife so many years ago was the right tempo.
Today, I believe I think you might agree that I buried the lead of my day if you read the rest of the story. Today started out wonderfully. An early morning video chat with siblings and cousins to just do our own private football pre-game show. I grew up in the suburbs of Buffalo NY and hence remain a Bills fan for life. While I may not see the value in jumping and breaking folding tables as seems to be the practice of the “Bill’s Mafia”, the fanbase is quite loyal. Truthfully, it will just be nice to see a subset of the family. The magic of technology again saves the day. We will originate from four different states and six different regions and it will be “almost as good as being there”. We live in wonderful times. More tools are constantly emerging to allow us to celebrate this wonderful world. Life is Good!!!
We are also, of course, amidst the major league baseball playoffs which I still enjoy immensely. Finally, the evening will wrap up with the Bills vs the Chiefs in a repeat of last year’s AFC Championship game. I am hoping for a different result. Since I make these posts at 7 pm I guess I will report on my scope, baseball, and football-based moods tomorrow. By the way, today’s photo is in hope that the hometown team manages a win. A family call this morning had people weigh in with a guess for the final. The consensus is a 31-29 thriller for the Bills on the road. Tomorrow’s post will more accurately analyze the results.
Thanks for reading and hope you enjoyed today’s post and will return again tomorrow.
If you just cannot wait, you can see how this story ends at
Great writing Mark. Hope Monday's post reports things went well.